I know that one of the things I'm working on in this physical life/experience is getting past my separation anxiety. I've been challenged by it my whole life but have been progressing with it lately. When I was a child, I'd cry and get very upset when my mom/parents would leave my sister and I with a sitter or with a relative for a period of time. I had more emotional challenges being physically detached from my mom. I believe that this is in part because of the abuse my mom endured from my dad while they were married. I was very scared when experiencing it when I was very young, but as I grew older, I became braver and became very protective of my mom. I'd even physically get in the way of what my dad was doing and even told my dad that if he didn't stop, I'd fight with him. On one occasion, I ended up punching him in the face because of how he was screaming at my mom for no reason. He was so stunned and didn't say a word after that and never tried to hurt me phsyically.
Anyway, back to my separation anxiety issues. I also believe that I have them in part because of being *separated* from my soul family in the spiritual realms. I've been having many OBEs lately about this... most of them being with my ex-husband (getting very sad when separating from him in the OBE). We are still friends and talk occasionally. In the recent past, I'd get sad while being physically awake about the things we shared that I cherish. After having many of those OBEs, I don't feel that so much anymore. However, I still have the same type of OBE pretty regularly.
The OBE from last night that I remember was about my separation anxiety... but the theme was a bit different. I was very upset in it because of family members who had passed on from the physical plane... even though I was in an OBE... and even though some of the people who'd passed on are still here in the physical and some really have passed on from the physical. The last person who was left from my family was my mom. I ended up getting really upset and crying... bellering... because of it. I was standing by a white pick-up truck and began to wail... and then I leaned on the truck and put my head down on it and put my hands on my head. I then stopped crying and thought that I was overreacting.
Anyway, my mom and I have had friction between us here and there for quite some time. I've been figuring a lot out... how different experiences have affected me throughout my life... finally understanding them. I've discovered that some of them come from ways in which my mom has hurt me emotionally, and I'm working on getting past them. Anyway, lately, she and I have been getting along very well. In the past, we'd argue quite a bit, because I can't stand it when people try to control me and push me around... which she tried to do sometimes... moreso in the past. But lately, we've been getting along well. There's more calm between us, and she is learning to let go of the control she's tried to place on me.
I see my mom as a companion... a friend... as well as my mom... and I also see her as a sister. I guess I moreso see her as a sister... emotionally and spiritually but *physically* as a mother... because of certain factors. I feel like she is a sister more than my mother at times... or like she's someone who's to learn certain things from me.
I know what the separation anxiety OBEs are about... but sometimes I feel like I've worked past them for the most part (not 100%, though), and I tend to question why I keep experiencing OBEs about them. I feel like them and most of my OBEs are way more intense than my physical realm experiences... I guess that's why I've been questioning them lately. The intensity of them is so strong, and when I wake up *here*, I say to myself, "The feelings I'm experiencing in them are much stronger than I experience them in the physical. Why do I keep having the OBEs?"
Do I feel that higher level of intensity of the OBEs as compared to expereinces in the physical because the spiritual realms are a lot less dense? Does it have something to do with the importance of what the OBEs are about?
I'm thinking that I keep having those separation anxiety OBEs because I still have work to do in relation to them, even though I feel like I've grown from them a lot and aren't as bothered by the separation anxiety like in the past. I still am attached to people in the physical in some manner... in the way of not wanting them to pass on.
Thoughts on all of this?