In my opinion, any lecture about love that does'nt speak of FEAR is incomplete. You CANNOT fully understand love without understanding the relationship between LOVE and FEAR.
It is similar to the relationship between light and darkness or hot and cold. That is, OPPOSITE. The more there is of one, the less there is of the other. (the more light, the less darkness, the more heat, the less cold). But how could we understand "heat" without "cold"? How could we describe "light" without "darkness"? Fear will PREVENT us from experiencing LOVE. The more FEAR (high entropy) the less LOVE (low entropy).
LOVE is the best way to describe a highly evolved (spiritually), LOW entropy being, and all spiritual growth moves us in the direction of "BECOMING LOVE".
FEAR is one way to describe spiritual devolution. Moving in the direction of FEAR is the OPPOSITE of spiritual progress.
I sometimes use the expression "Fight or FLight" to describe it. It expresses itself mostly at the "BEING" (or "instinctive") level, and less so at the conscious level. If you find yourself in a situation where danger is present, there is a choice to make. The choice is only one of two actions, fight or flee. There is only a limited amount of time to choose. If I think only of my self, and my OWN safety the easy choice is to run. But what if there are other innocents in the path of the "danger"? I could save myself but others might suffer or even die. Many times we will choose the easy or seemingly obvious choice, and regret it later, especially if someone we love gets injured as a result of our actions, inaction or fear. Times up. Not making a choice is STILL an action, and not taking action is STILL a choice. There are NO neutral parties.
And in order to understand FEAR and its relationship to LOVE you must understand the relationship between FEAR, EGO and selfishness. These relationships are more important than EROS and SEX in relationship to LOVE. Once we understand the relationships between fear, ego and selfishness, we can better undertstand our opinions and beliefs about sex, and eros, and how we view relationships in general.
Albert Einstein has been attributed with saying "The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe."
Tom explains LOVE vs FEAR and the relationships between LOVE, FEAR, EGO and selfishness in his book MBT (as well as in numerous video lectures and seminars). He is (in my opinion) 100% correct in his analysis of these relationships. They are NOT new ideas, and he is not alone in his views. Mystics throughout history have been expressing similar concepts.
The struggle between LOVE and FEAR has been going on since the beginning. We tell stories and sing songs of "heroes" that passed the test, and "villains" who have failed. All the worlds "great" religions, at their core, tell us ways to overcome fear and become LOVE.
The more I consider these things the more I feel that there is only ONE consciousness, of which I am a small part, and there is only ONE choice, LOVE or FEAR.
I do understand that is order for us to know love we must know also the opposite (fear). same with hot or cold etc...
So, knowing that I still have a problem trying to put it in practical daily life...
I don't know... I guess I will just wait and see what life has for me... I do consider myself a person that knows love and knows how to give it. I just found a really difficult person to share it with...