What exactly can be called a fear ?
I have been thinking about fears I may have. Can a fear be something that you just dont like and avoid, not scared of but embarrassed by ?
I dont like being centre of attention and I avoid putting myself in situations where I might be. I would not sing at a karaoke or give a speech in public, I cringe thinking about it. Its not a fear as in scared, more embarrassing and feeling
Daft, I just aren't comfortable in social situations. . Could this be classed as a " fear " caused by ego ? Ive always put it down to my personality rather than fear.
Or does Tom meam major fears, is the above a fear, a trivial fear or not a fear.
If you are embarrassed by something that means you are stressed out by the words or deeds of yourself or others. Often our own personal thoughts also can make us feel embarrassed/stressed.
Stress is created by the inability to deal with an experience which is fundamentally, incoming data or input.
Inability to deal with input no matter what that input is, is more often than not down to ignorance and it is ignorance generates fear.
The word ignorance (lack of knowledge or understanding) is interesting because it seems to have become synonymous with stupid (lack of understanding or common sense), which of course has a completely different meaning.
Often people do not want to admit ignorance because they are afraid of being perceived as ill informed at best or stupid at worst and these feelings cause fear to rise.
Ignorance is lies at the root of fear.
Fear = high entropy.
As soon as you cannot calculate all the possibilities, as soon as you start being unable to live with the uncertainty of anything at all, oops, fear rises.
That is why having the courage to learn to live gracefully with uncertainty is so cool.
It allows you to say, in any situation at all, "hey, I don't know, I do not know what you are talking about, could you please explain that to me..." often it is just a matter of you or the person or persons you are communicating with switching out the metaphors...but again, people are afraid to put themselves on the firing line and admit ignorance in case....in case of what? In case they look stupid!
If you try the 'coming clean method' and admit ignorance to something, often you will find that the other party or parties are also ignorant, and they used a whole load of words, stringing sentences together that maybe sound good but do not really mean anything, to blind you with verbiage in order to veil their own ignorance from you!
And, you do not need to poke a dog with a stick and expose the ignorance of others in an over dramatic way or in a mean way. It is easier, because it cuts through any tension, to be light hearted when pointing out your percieved flaws in the outpourings of others...you can have fun for all, without your own ego rising up and being rude or hurtful...you do not have to punish someone for hiding their ignorance, this would be you, basing your own response to their ignorance in fear.
Using the power of assertion and humiliation to gain control of a conversation or situation would be a fearful response...humility in the face of ignorance (yours or anyone else's) helps breed compassion.
Here are a few words from Tom Campbell about fear.
This is an extract from the famous 'fear and ego aside', MBT Book 2, Section 3, Chapter 42, which is entitled ' Does the Big Dude Have Feelings or a Personality? What Does Love Have to Do With Consciousness?
"Fear resides in the intent or motivation, not in the action.
For example, purposely avoiding trouble may be an act of good judgement and not necessarily an act motivated by fear.
Fear, as a product of intent, represents a state or condition of consciousness.
Fear is like mind-cancer; it is a disease of consciousness, a dysfunctional condition of ignorance trapped within a little picture.
Fear is expressed by a high entropy intent driving action that reflects neither understanding nor vision.
Like a biological cancer, fear is debilitating and destructive of the system in which it grows." end of quote