Joolsner: 1. how are you defining what is "male" and what is "female" if reproduction as you state is not an issue here? I imagined that in NPMR there would be no male or female entities and that this only applied to earth, but of course I have not ventured "out" as much as Tom has. Basically, what is "male" and what is "female" in NPMR?
Tom: It has to do with how an entity defines himself/herself -- thinks of himself/herself and how one's interaction is interpreted. It is not about body parts, there is no body -- it is also not about drive or reproduction. If the being has been in a PMR where there are body parts and reproduction, it may identify itself with one sex or the other more strongly -- or it may identify with neither -- or it may have no such experience. When I notice maleness or femaleness in an entity that is my personal interpretation -- a metaphor I use to describe the nature of the being, the personality, I am interacting with.
Think of it this way, if you were to correspond with multiple people multiple times over a long period of time by email (to the point that you had an established significant relationship with each as "pen-pals") and their names were not gender specific, then, based on both the information exchanged and the tone and style of the interaction, it is likely that some you would definitely think of a male, others as female, and some would remain indeterminate. If you were describing each of your pen-pals to someone else, your language would force you to use he or she (male or female language forms) and to describe the "neithers" as such. You could refer to each as "this person", however, trying to avoid gender typing (especially if gender seemed obvious) would make your communication stilted and awkward -- PMR languages are very sexually structured. It would be natural, by virtue of your PMR experience and habits, to interpret the content and nature of each interaction as male-like, female-like, or neither. We are creatures of our cultures, much of how we choose interact is dependent on that judgment.
The Big Cheese comes across as definitely "male-like" in terms of my PMR experience -- so that is the way I describe/interpret him. Likewise the Big Cheese is as he is because of the way he defines himself or he wouldn't come across that way. There is no male and female in NPMR in PMR terms (body parts defining gender) --just mannerisms, attitudes and personal styles and approaches that seem more feminine or masculine to PMR veterans. Yes, the Big Cheese has much experience in PMR.
Joolsner: 2. Also, in a Robert Monroe interview on Youtube Monroe talks about meeting with a non-physical being who was a "he/she". Tom states (ibid.) that " beings can be male, female, or neither"; was this he/she in Monroe's encounter a "neither" in Tom's definition do you think?
Tom: There are: he, she, both (alternating or indeterminate), and neither/neuter. These descriptors Represent the self-image of the transmitter and the interpretation of the receiver.
Joolsner: 3. Is it possible that in another NPMR the Big Cheese there is a female entity? If this is the case then how is the sexual identity of a given NPMR decided or evolved? In which case how does the sexual identity of a given Big Cheese influence his/her jurisdiction if you like?
Tom: Of course a female or neuter entity could be a Big Cheese. It would influence their decisions by tone and approach - different personalities. Either could be more effective in different situations.
Joolsner: 4. Regarding non-physical beings having sex: Please explain more.
Tom: What is called "sex" in NPMR is a voluntary, intense, positive, mutual energy sharing/exchange between entities. It can take many forms - all forms are not perceived or interpreted (based on PMR experience) as "sexual". Each individual interprets their "energy exchange" experience in their own way based upon their personal experience. Under certain relational circumstances between entities, it can emotionally feel somewhat like the best of love based PMR sex, but much more expansive and deep, and not so one-dimensional or driven.